Waroum Ich ??!! (why me)

well the adventures since i left the relative safety of the internet cafe yesterday.
i proceeded to get myself thoroughly lost. i think Köln got me back for saying it was boring.

picture me, totally lost on the city fringe, no idea which way the city is. (got all turned round) and it starts to rain. heavily. i have no umbrella. its then, as im dashing blindly for civilised shelter, that i realise that all the walking ive done over the past weeks has worn a hole in the bottom of my favorite sneakers, and my left foot is getting wet, and im squelching as i run. sigh. and just to really put the icing on the cake, my bladder has delcared an emergency situation on board.

i run on, and finally, after waiting two large spas and possibly a couple of washing loads worth of rainwater just to cross at some lights, from which i could see on the other side, shop awnings, beckoning their santuary, like an oasis in the desert. a very wet desert.
finally i gained cover, and watched with envy, as passersby carried umbrellas past me like some giant sadistic sushi train, after youve already eaten your fill.

i briefly pondered the countries criminal penalties for mugging, and trying to recall if there are any parton saints for rain stoppage, and took the opportunity to look at my city map.
but where was i ??
i guestimated the park i had just run past mightbe the one in the top left hand corner, seemingly miles from anywhere (how the hell did i get here) so figuring i might be on "this" street, i waited for the rain to ease, and using a very scientific "eeny meeny mynee mo" i walked (squelched) off in one direction.

about an hour later, after many map consultations and blind guesses, i got back to my street. phew.

dinner was the biggest donner kebab ive ever seen....it was served in a bap roll not a pita roll, and it was so wide i couldnt get my mouth around it.
i had declined an invitation to the sauna with friends of Jens, and have opted for the safe warm security of my cell (after my day, i thought it was best) and watched desperate housewives in german.

i forgot to mention that my room has no clock. but its ok, the old church down the road lets me know what time it is, 4 times an hour. (i was so glad to know it was 3am last night) my cell block also comes with the additional torture feature of fresh baked bread smells at about 3.30am its so strong, your mouth waters for it.

still having an ok time speaking german. the people here seem to be so much more pleasant to speak german with. i see the occaisional smile at my german, as they realise im not a native, but appreciate the attempt and they talk slower back to me, then in hamburg.

one thing i like about the germans is ive learned that they love to play with their language.
theres over 17 different dialects of german. aparently i speak plat deutsche. (its what the fisch kopfs speak)
and even with the different dialects to contend with, they like to play with the words. not only are there different words for the same thing, dependant on context and emotive strength, and based on colloquialism, but you can add 2 or more words together to make a completly different word to specifically describe another thing. some times the translation is amusing.
for example my 2 faves.

stadtrundfahrt translates as city-round-drive which actually means city tour.

and my all time fave

brustwartzen which translates as breast-wart, and actually means nipple.

when you think about it the imagery is logical, but when i heard this i almost wet myself.

and its a great language to tell someone off in. you can really throw a very descriptive insult, in a way and tone that really shows how much you mean it.

halt die klappa du labetaschendrecklockfotzenleckmachine !!!


with all this confusion, its no wonder so many germans have problems with their own language. its not uncommon to hear someone asking what a word means or how someone else says a particular word.

today (yesterday when i wrote this down) Sara Conner and Marc (the german version of Jessica Simpson and Nick) got married. (it was sooooooo twee you could puke)
i cant believe they have made a german version of this. mind you, we in Australia make Jessie and Marty, the love story, so best i not bag too much.
they even have a german Rove here. HELP!


well wednesday...today..has brought with it clear blue skies and a nice mild temp. today i walked and walked.. shopping day.... can you believe after 4 hours of walking the entire length of the city...all i ended up with was 3 lousy postcards. had a bit of a nana nap this afternoon as my legs were threating to go on strike.

one good thing out of the last few days has been ive been inspired to continue writing my book. (the main body of which i think may be lost in a old hard drive which i desperately have to retrieve)

anyways... the adventure is continuing. have so much on my mind, that im basically walking around the city in a daze, but im taking photos where i can so that ill prob look backina months time and think what the hell was that ???

ok chatzies....bis gleis (i know thats not spelled right)

TSCHUß !!